So many horror movies and so few frights.
Honestly, only Woman In Black has come close in recent times to making Mrs W and myself jump as much as the daft old House Of Horrors attraction at Universal Studios last week.
And there you could see the scares coming because all it amounted to was people jumping out of the darkness.
As an aside, go in if you get the chance, I can't remember jumping or laughing as much in ages.
I did neither to any great extent during The Innkeepers.
Ti West's story is yet another on the old haunted hotel theme.
This time, two staff (Sara Paxton and Pat Healy) are left to look after the inn over its last weekend before closing down.
They have only three guests, Kelly McGillis, as a fading actress (how appropriate), and a mum with her young son.
Thus they have time to spend on their hobby which is examining psychic phenomena.
This turns out to be a happy coincidence because such an entity is residing in the very hotel they are working and as the weekend progresses is responsible for all sorts of bumps in the night.
The problem with The Innkeepers is that the excitement is too sporadic and when it finally comes it is totally predictable.
Its script is stodgy and I believed in none of the cast.
One minute Paxton seems to be scared out of her wits, the next she is thirsting for more action. Healy, meanwhile, just looks a bit bored most of the time and McGillis has equivalent screen presence of an ironing board.
I am baffled that so many folk on twitter have spoken so highly of it because it left me feeling as flat as a paper frisbee.
Laughs: none
Jumps: one for me, three for Mrs W
Vomit: none
Nudity: nope
Overall rating: 3.5/10
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